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Thursday, January 15, 2015

Embracing Change

Yippy skippy, it's 2015! Although, 2014 was such a wonderful year for me in a number of ways. My honeybee and I purchased our first home, I continue to have a job that I absolutely love, I started this little blog that has brought me so much joy, and [most importantly] my pops made it through another year despite the best of the best doctors telling us otherwise. I am so very thankful for 2014 that it almost makes me sad to move forward. 

Last year was a wonderful year, but it was also a stressful one. I have mentioned in the past on the struggles that we went through with my pops and to be honest with y'all, you wouldn't understand unless you were going through it with me.  If there is one thing I have learned about myself in 2014, it's that I am a total avoider. When things go wrong or I have too much on my plate, I avoid it completely.  As a result, I over commit myself, obsess over perfection, let it all get the best of me.  I read an article a while back that has started to resurface that, despite not having children, really spoke out to me. These couple of lines in particular really pulled the strings of my heart:

"Excessive phone use, commitment overload, multiple page to-do lists and the pursuit of perfection consumed me.  And yelling at the people I loved was a direct result of the loss of control I was feeling in my life.  Inevitably, I had to fall apart somewhere.  So I fell apart behind closed doors in the company of the people who meant the most to me." 

When I read those words, I stopped dead in my tracks. I was completely guilty of this. If it wasn't for my honeybee walking with me every step of the way last year, my life could have taken a completely different turn.  Maybe you are guilty of this too, but perhaps not. Either way,  last year was all about embracing my life- flaws and all.  I had to face it head on, difficulties and all, and because of it, I made it out a much better and stronger person. I realized that it was time to stop hiding behind my to-do lists, stop over committing myself, and just embrace life as I saw it. 

Perhaps you noticed, chickadees, that I took a little bloggity break towards the end of 2014. We had just moved into our new home and I came to the realization that life was just going to fly right past me if I constantly hid behind my deadlines.  So I slowly disconnected myself between the social media world. I felt that it was something I had to do in order to bring myself back to center. I owed it to myself, to my career, and to those that I hold so near and dear to my heart. 

So here is to 2015, a brand new year! May it help me to be the best version of myself and here's to you, too! May your year be filled with happiness, positive change, and good vibes only!

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